Odd factoids

[Drago]

Timmy Mallet had club foot.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Timmy Mallet is the cousin of Timmy Mullet, who has a club haircut.

 

[Drago]

The mullet was patented by Peter Stringfellow.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

String fellow was made from cheese

 

[Bonefish Blues]

Fish, the famous lanky Marillion front man, earned his nickname because that's how he smelled.

Fish regarded that as a step forward from his previous nickname because Christ on a Bike what's that effing smell wasn't quite as catchy, he thought, probably correctly.

 

[classic33]

Time to repeat the 3 golden rules of engineering:

1 Always use the right tool for the job
2 The right tool for any job is a hammer
3 Any tool can be used as a hammer

The third rule should read,
Any tool can use a hammer

 

[Profpointy]

The third rule should read,
Any tool can use a hammer

Very good, That's the fourth rule for my next telling

 

[Bonefish Blues]

Monarchs do not have to follow in sequence, they can choose their favourite number. It's therefore a 11471734279 chance that they have run sequentially thus far.

Charles intends to be King Charles the 4.2, however, so this may change shortly.

 

[Drago]

King Charles spaniels are not named after king Charles. Just the opposite. The first king with that name was due to be king Mamaduke the 12th, but he was such a fan of the dogs he took the name King Charles.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Spaniels are descended from Spaniards who fought for the cavaliers during the English civil war. They were the original dogs of war.

 

[Bonefish Blues]

Spaniels are descended from Spaniards who fought for the cavaliers during the English civil war. They were the original dogs of war.

You've omitted the important fact that they were in fact ridden into war by Brigades of Marmoset monkeys, their role being to tickle the War Horses' feet, thereby unseating their knights, whose visors would bury deep in the ground with their legs in the air, thereby leaving them defenceless against the teams of ladies of doubtful virtue, who travelled the field with attendant scribes to record their indiscretions on vellum and extract substantial bribes later.
It got to the point that knights could no longer afford to fight, and thereby battles were actually won. Historians and Archaeologists have conspired to keep the truth from you until now, but I felt I could contain it no longer.

 

[Drago]

Knights did not wear armour. They were in fact a warrior class of kitchen implement salesman, and would tote their wares from town to town by attaching them to their bodies. When called to war they would keep the saucepans attached to their bodies for safe keeping, and it was discovered in about AD 1100 that this made the knitgts almost invulnerable to machine gun fire.

 

[Bonefish Blues]

I note that our esteemed colleague uses the original spelling of Knights - splendid form. Mind you it was the original spelling of their Laddies that caused much consternation and ultimately resulted in their dying out as a class.

 

[Threevok]

Lance Armstrong was originally a jousting tournament

 

[Bonefish Blues]

Lance Armstrong was originally an artificially-enhanced jousting tournament

EFA