True Facts About Ross Kemp
- Thread starter Drago
- Start date
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Mad Doug Biker
Banned from every bar in the Galaxy
- Location
- Craggy Island
The Snow Leopard only finally revealed itself and got itself filmed because Ross Kemp told it too.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Ross Kemp, a big supporter of Palestine Achtung, was arrested over 500 times on Saturday.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Archaeologists unearthed and extension to the Bayeux Tapestry in which Ross Kemp single handedly repels the invaders.
- Location
- Inside my skull
Ross Kemp went into space with Blue Origin. A fellow passenger farted, so Ross opened the escape hatch, killing everyone on board except himself.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Then new SpinLaunch centrifuge orbital launch system is the be powered by an exercise bike pedalled by Ross Kemp.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
Despite all of the above, not many people know that Ross Kemp is the World Crochet Champion, 2007-08, and 2010-2011
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
When the car airbag was developed the original prototype was shaped like Ross Kemp's fist.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
Ross Kemp once stood on a piece of Lego, the Lego let out the most piercing scream of pain imaginable
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Contrary to popular belief the Titanic did not hit an iceberg. It collided with Ross Kemp who was crossing the Atlantic backstroke for a bet.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
The dark is scared of Ross Kemp.
Way-Out-West
Senior Member
- Location
- Pinno's attic
Geoff Capes retired from the World’s Strongest Man when he witnessed Ross Kemp juggling the Atlas stones.
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Ross Kemp was signed up to play James Bond, but when it came to film the opening scene where he falls into a swimming pool full of sharks it all went wrong as, at the very moment when he was due to fall into the water, the sharks jumped out and ran away.
With a tight filming schedule the producers were straight on the phone to Daniel Craig, and the rest is history.
With a tight filming schedule the producers were straight on the phone to Daniel Craig, and the rest is history.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
not many people know this, but the song, "The Devil Went Down To Georgia" is based on true events, Old Nick did appear in Georgia looking for a soul to steal, however he made a grave error when he approached the first person he came across, a certain Ross Kemp, who took The Devil up on his fiddle challenge, however it all went badly when Ross out played him, chased him down the street, hitting the Devil with his violin, then inserting the bow into Beelzebub's bottom, it's no wonder that The Devil tries to harm every human he now comes across, also the reason why Didi, the Tour de France Devil leaps up & down like a madman, is that his act is an accurate representation of Ross violating The Devils posterior
Mad Doug Biker
Banned from every bar in the Galaxy
- Location
- Craggy Island
If Ross Kemp ever actually reads this thread, then the universe will cease to exist and he will then spend an eternity bullying the remaining nothingness that will exist around him.
